#TheProposal

The man after my own heart

She had a life of her own, however, once in love, it became hard for her to remember how she managed to live without him. Of course, she was alive before she met her husband, but she is beginning to think she really did not start ‘living’ until she met her husband.

That’s what love can do to you. -DBM

#TheProposal

“I love anniversaries – the first meeting, first date, first kiss, etc… Today is exactly one year, my guy asked Two (2) questions in One (1) proposal:

To be his girlfriend and

To be his wife

Hahaha… I thought it was crazy because it was too soon, but here we are, two months as husband and wife and we are forever grateful to God. Cathy my roomie will testify that I had always believed in dating someone for a couple of years before settling down, but charleeeey, when you know, you know!

Here I was, 30 years, independent and confident medical doctor who was “out of reach in connection to matters of the heart” – that’s what I told my suitors to leave me alone. My parents, other family members, friends, church elders, neighbors and all concerned citizens were worried that I wasn’t bringing anyone home. I wasn’t excited about any guy; my conversations were about work and going back to school.

My mum especially was supper worried. As good parents, they sat me down and asked me what was wrong. Hehhehe! I grinned and gave them a serious speech: I didn’t want to be bothered about marriage. I was glad they were worried but they shouldn’t because I had lot of suitors.

I told them I was also interested in getting married but I wanted to be super sure before I took that step. See David, I wrote a short testimony in 2016 on Facebook which went viral and which brought hundreds of proposals in my inbox. I was shocked and just tired of telling men – no thank you. I was just not interested! I turned down lots of opportunities connected to marriage. So I told my parents that I wasn’t desperate to get married; and should they bother me about this marriage thing again, I’ll choose Four (4) out of the hundreds of suitors for them to interview, then choose one but they should know that I can easily walk out of that marriage once it was going to be their choice.

Yep, I threatened them!

I just didn’t want to be pressurized! This is what I wanted from God concerning my marriage – a man who loves God and who will love me as Christ loves the church. The first time my husband sent me a message was on the 19th April 2016, and I first saw it and answered on 1st October 2016. I beg – it wasn’t too known biaa, it was part of the hundreds of messages in my archives which I just didn’t notice. He will write every now and then and ask how I was doing and work. I tried my best not to encourage him and in a nice way told him he was being a bother.

He told me he wanted us to be friends and asked me to let him know anytime I was in town which I didn’t. I was working outside Accra at that time and rarely came to Accra but I never bothered to meet him. We rarely chatted because I was very unwelcoming towards him so I can’t even say we were friends, we were just acquaintances on Facebook messenger, until I agreed for us to meet in August 2017 whiles on leave in Accra. It was a Friday. A friend and I attended a program at national theatre and so I told my husband to meet me there. He was late, so I thought he wasn’t going to come and that made me happy because I could use that to tell him to stop writing to me. Then he arrived when I was having a very terrible throbbing headache which made me very moody.

I immediately made him aware of the situation and the fact that I wasn’t interested in a chit chat. This guy walked through the rain to go buy me a pain killer even though I told him not to and stayed until I felt better. He stayed through the rest of the program. So that was our first official meeting and it ended well because we really had time to chat. It wasn’t love at first meeting, but he earned a second meeting/date which he actually pestered me for.

I left Accra the following week but we kept in touch. Our friendship grew over the weeks. We were very transparent and honest to each other. I told him I wasn’t interested in a relationship at that time he told me he wanted us to be friends and see if that could end in a relationship. I always made sure the guys I went out with knew that I will never have sex with them outside marriage and I’ve been very lucky to always know those who could wait and those who couldn’t!

I’ve been blackmailed, insulted and ridiculed about how serious I was with being chaste until marriage. I don’t know why people always associated it with religion, but I made the decision when I didn’t even really understand it! Less than a month after our first meeting, I came to my friend, Odua’s wedding in Accra, after which I went on a date with my husband at Legon Botanical Garden. That night, he proposed on phone.

David, I accepted the proposal as a “trial” because of stories you had shared on your page, some of the stories gave me hope that you don’t need to know someone for years before settling down. They gave me hope that marriages can and are working if both put in equal efforts. To me it was a trial, a trial oooo but then I grew in love with this new friend and by December 2017, he was ready for us to get married after knowing him for 4 months, but I wasn’t ready!

I prayed about him, mum prayed about him and grandma did too and we were all at peace about him but I still wasn’t ready to be married in January or April 2018 because I felt it was too soon, and yes, I was having cold feet. The alpha woman was having cold feet to marry, not because I wasn’t sure but like daaaahhhh, this was really happening … Hahahahahahaah

I finally agreed to be married on my 31st birthday.

(NB : My husband didn’t know about my viral post, he read it after I showed it to him early this year we weren’t friends on Facebook)

My dearest ANKE, you pursued our friendship for 2 years and I’m glad you didn’t give up on me. (I asked him why he stuck around, he said he doesn’t know. He just felt to keep in touch)

Sorry for all the ‘unlooking’ I did.

I’m glad we grew in love with each other.

I’m glad you asked me a year ago to be your girlfriend and your wife

I’m glad I said yes to the trial

I’m glad you were worth the wait

I love you very much moi dorogoi Andrew.

See, God knows us, He knows who will make you happy. Don’t sweat it. I asked God for someone who loves God and who will love me as Christ loves the church and that’s what I got.

We just finished praying together.

PS: Sometimes, I open my eyes to look at him as we pray and I bless God for bringing him my way…. The way he loves God just turns me on…. OK…. Bye bye❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Lyubov” – From ADAMS

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