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Stabbed

“Dave, it’s been seven months and I am still sex starving. I have gotten to the point where I have psyched myself not to think of sex to even think of engaging in the act. This strategy of mine is now working as I don’t get the urge for sex any longer whenever I am with my wife and she is fine. No complains from her with regards to sex. However, I am worried because this is a very young marriage and I fear for its future.” – WJ

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“Dave, thanks for the good work you are doing. I think my wife is gradually losing me. We have been married for five years with two boys. I married her a virgin. Dave, I can count the number of times we have been intimate within our years of marriage and I can tell you the number of times we have gotten intimate within these years of marriage won’t be up to 30.

It has always been from one excuse to the other. Dave, my wife is a good woman, supportive, hardworking: a mother and a wife but the intimacy no dey, Dave. I haven’t cheated yet but I fear I may. At a point I thought she was giving me excuses not to get intimate with me because the kids stress her. I bought a washing machine, always do the cooking on weekends and help out with the washing.

The major thing she does now is to take care of the kids. She isn’t employed so she’s always home. Yet Dave, our sexual lifestyle still sucks. It’s not as if I don’t keep a good personal hygiene – I do. I visit the dentist, clean the sacred region, shave nicely and use some good colognes and anti-perspirants she mostly recommends. I once advised she goes to see a gynecologist but she went, met the Gynae, only to return home and tell me she couldn’t discuss her bedmatics with the man because she was shy… So, if it bothered me so much then I ought to go with her to explain things to the man myself.

That one mpo de3, no sweat. But again, I felt it could be psychological so I booked an appointment with a psychologist for us to meet her because she (my wife) had complications during delivery so should the psychologist psyche her a little, I felt would be fine. That didn’t work out either.

Dave, it’s been seven months and I am still sex starving. I have gotten to the point where I have psyched myself not to think of sex to even think of engaging in the act. This strategy of mine is now working as I don’t get the urge for sex any longer whenever I am with my wife and she is fine. No complains from her with regards to sex. However, I am worried because this is a very young marriage and I fear for its future.

I have bought every libido enhancer one could ever imagine for her. Both local and foreign and there hasn’t been any improvement. Dave, there have been times I have been awake in the middle of the night, sat by my boys on their bed and wept like a baby because I fear for the future of our marriage. I think I don’t know what to do any longer, Dave. What hurts me the most is an incident that happened barely 4 days ago. I happened to be on phone with a female friend of mine who had an issue and was confiding in me. Unknown to me, my wife was eavesdropping on my conversation though I suspected she couldn’t hear exactly what we discussed, but by virtue of how sober I was on phone with the lady, she accused me of having something to do with her.

She then threatened me after the phone call that she was prepared to put aside Christianity and Kill me should she ever catch me cheating. Dave, the truth is this lady I had the conversation with is even nowhere near my league (I guess you understand what I mean?) So, I got scared. I got scared not because of her threats but because her threat confirmed a dream I had in which she stabbed me. That was about three years ago. Ever since I had that dream, I’ve had fears leaving the washroom door opened when bathing. Even if I do, I quickly wash the lather off my face because it always dawned on me she is likely to stab me one day.

Until recently, I could barely sleep with both eyes closed because the dream kept haunting me. With all these, it isn’t as if I haven’t sat her down to speak to her. I can’t count the number of times I have done these. Getting relatives involved in our marital issues is also a no-no. I am now a confused man. I have no joy. My only source of joy as it stands are my children, my boys.

Hmmmm! Nsem pii ba God dey. Dave, I fear for my life and the future of my marriage. I don’t know what to do now. There is still no sexual intimacy in the marriage. Do I walk away or stay? I need the opinion of your followers.”

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