#InboxMessages

Positive spin

My grandma gave birth to my mother at age 15. My mother had me at 16. I had my daughter at 18. My grandma died when I was 6. She never married. My father was forced to marry my mother when she got pregnant with me but their marriage ended because my father was already married with children to another woman. The father of my daughter is not in our lives though he is alive. Dave, when my daughter turned 14, I started to get worried because she had the body, height and face.
Men were starring at her everywhere we went. At first, I used to think they were checking me out but my daughter told me they would stop to give their phone numbers to her and ask about where she stays. I knew if care was not taken, history would repeat itself. I didn’t want that to happen to her. Being a single parent is no joke. My experience plagued me as a woman. My energy was sapped. I lost my confidence and truthfully, there was no joy left in me.

One day, my daughter came back home from school smiling. She had found the perfect job for me. She went to the house of a friend’s friend after school to help them with their homework. She said they trolled the neighborhood and came across job advertisement seeking a house help. I had HND and was working as a sales girl. The job was not paying any better salary but it was offering accommodation and food.

Dave, I called the number fast and expressed my interest. I was interviewed and the woman was impressed. I told her I had a teenage daughter. She didn’t mind. We had the boys’ quarters to ourselves. The job was to take care of her husband. He was recovering from stroke. Dave, two weeks in the new job, my Madam traveled to America. She is yet to set foot in Ghana. The last time I saw her face was when I was packing her luggage in the car. Her family also returned the drinks and washed their hands off the marriage 7 months after she left Ghana.

I spent 4 years taking care of the man. The woman was paying for my services and sending money to feed him. Dave, when the man got better and started to and talk again, I was all he had, I was all he knew. Up till now, I haven’t asked him what happened between him and his wife. He hasn’t said anything about her to me. The day I told his wife he had recovered, she stopped sending money. I have been with the man for 12years. Four and a half years, I have been taking care of him, and six years dating him.

We have a son together. I don’t know what he did to his wife but he has seen value in a woman. He cares so much about me and he just focuses on me. He will literally put his phone down or pause a movie just to give me his attention when I walk in a room. Dave, I am not an afterthought in his mind. If I need this man I am cohabiting with for whatever reason, he will drop everything to be there for me. He has entrusted me with his three huge properties in Tema, Achimota and Spintex to rent them out and manage the funds.

My daughter is also doing well by herself and my son will have the best future ahead of him. My son laughs when he catches his father staring at me and smiling to himself. My life has changed forever. The best part is that, my daughter has not gotten pregnant yet. She is in her 20s and changing the narrative. I don’t know why I am sharing my story with you but I feel my daughter and I managed to bring a positive spin to an otherwise bad situation. My attitude has been my choice in the years because I chose to rather see the glass as half full or empty when things weren’t going so well for me. I am very happy today Dave. I have found the energy, confidence and happiness in living to the fullest. He hasn’t said I love you in all these years but Dave, I am content.

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