“We live in a world that is always encouraging us to pursue happiness. We are asked to do whatever we love and chase our dreams, follow our hearts. There is nothing wrong with that. In the same way, happiness can never be the end-game if you are married. Feeling happy wouldn’t guarantee a happy marriage. And a lot of us men are selfish because we are only chasing after what makes us happy, not allowing anything to stand in our way to get it. My goal is to experience what it means to have a healthy marriage with P3.” – T S
My wife follows your Facebook activities and she sometimes reads stories from your page to me. I am not sure I can fully express our love story like she would have but I am going to try. My wife was a sex worker. I used to patronize her profession. It was a ‘pay as you go’ for me as a client to these girls. I treated them well whenever I was with one.
Fortunately or unfortunately, business with my wife took a different turn. Business became pleasure, pleasure formed a friendship and the friendship turned to feelings. By the way, we will be married for 11 years in September, 2020, and would you believe I have never looked at another woman since I first developed feelings for her? I have never also called her a ‘prostitute’ since I first confessed love to her. I have never looked down on her, I have never reminded her of her past. In fact, to me, it’s like there is no bad past to her credit because it was just a job she was doing then. And I met her in the line of duty.
I have friends who had in the past patronized her unique skills. I forgot to even mention this, she was introduced to me by my best man and former boss at work. They spoke highly of her abilities in bed and I was eager to try. My close friends still ask me till date, how I am able to see a good woman in her. When we were dating, I did not stop her from her job. I was strong to separate both women in my head. I knew out there she was surviving as a hooker, but when we met at my place, she was my girlfriend. I was interested in her day and would ask questions though it was difficult for me. I had to act supportive but was secretly praying she could stop sleeping with other men for money just for my sake. It took months before she finally told me she was done out of respect for me and what we had.
I am honest with my wife and we talk about everything. I asked her about her profession and got to know she was seeing herself through school with the monies made, and had to understand why it took her such a long time to call it quits. Her business couldn’t survive after falling in love with me. I stepped in by the way. She’s doing her second MSc in Accounting and Finance.
When I tell my colleagues I have never cheated on my wife before they doubt me. Lol! My marriage is very intact Mr. Dave, for just one simple reason: I treat Mrs. like my favorite hooker in the bedroom and our sex life and marriage is never a dull moment. And this is the truth, if every man cheating on his wife can treat the wife as how they treat these other women they’re seeing secretly, we would all have the strongest of marriages ever. You give the other woman money after sex, give your wife the money instead after sex to also go fix her hair and buy new dresses and shoes and perfumes for herself. You talk to your other woman sweetly and with respect; talk to your wife sweetly and with respect. You compliment the other woman on her beauty and look; compliment your wife’s beauty and look every day. You can tell the other woman you love her. Love your wife with your words. You make all these pretty freaky sexual requests from the other woman, and reward her after every session; reward your wife and make freaky sexual requests from her. You have time to make time for the other woman. Make time for your wife.
Dave, life can be that simple. Any man cheating on his wife is trying extra harder to please the other woman. Instead of going for another woman to quench my thirst, I try harder to rather please the woman I have promised to spend forever with. Two or three of my supposed friends have made attempts at my wife for a hook up with them even after marriage. She shares all these messages they send her with me and I pretend I do not know when we hang out. I am not insecure because I trust my wife. She’s asked me to trust her so I do. I ask for the kind of treatment I want as her husband at home, and I get it. I ask for the kind of sex I want in the bedroom and I get it. I have these stupid fetishes; I tell her about them and I get it. She asks for what she wants, and she gets it. She wanted me to pay for her first and second degrees, I did. She’s paying for her third degree because she has a good job. She demanded fidelity, and I have been faithful to her. She needed me home on time to help with the house and the children. I prioritize my responsibilities to the house and the family before everything else. It’s like a healthy transaction with us.
You give something kakra to take something kakra.
Most guys are not paying their spouses for the sex given them so they feel they have the right to simply walk in the bedroom to demand for it. Your wife is not a restaurant menu to request for pork and beef instantly. But Dave, even at the restaurant we pay for the instant requests. We have it so easy as men in our marriages we tend to take these women caring for us and our children for granted. My wife is one blunt lady when it comes to what she wants, and is open about everything. I am the same with her. I may need sex but I don’t deserve it from her if I do not know how to talk to her. I do not deserve sex if I do not know how to love her right. I do not deserve it if I am not true to her and faithful in all my deeds. She owes me no sex if I cannot help with the house chores. Most guys do not even know what gives their wives pleasure, but they know how to turn a side chick on. As my dad told me on my wedding day,
‘if you fail at home, you will never be succeeding out there with the other woman. She may only be managing you kakra for whatever she’s benefiting at the moment. You’re nothing special to a woman you’re cheating on your wife with.’
My wife knows what turns me on and excites me. I know what excites and turns her on because we talk about these things openly. Sometimes, I am supposed to be at work in the afternoons but I create excuses just to hook up with my wife at a hotel close to her office. We spend an hour or two to fuck. It’s a once in a week ritual we have. It’s so fun, Dave, getting laid on company time. The best sex is not with the ‘other’ woman. The best sex is the one you have with your wife and feel like getting away with it. A perfect example is our hotel escapes. We know we have afternoon meetings at work, we know the office may be calling us, we know we stand a chance of losing our jobs, but we take the risks anyways, for the sake of intimacy. No risk is as exciting as this.
My wife’s name on my phone is P3. I had scored all the ladies I was sleeping with then with positions. She was third, but has been number one for 11 years. We live in a world that is always encouraging us to pursue happiness. We are asked to do whatever we love and chase our dreams, follow our hearts. There is nothing wrong with that. In the same way, happiness can never be the end-game if you are married. Feeling happy wouldn’t guarantee a happy marriage. And a lot of us men are selfish because we are only chasing after what makes us happy, not allowing anything to stand in our way to get it. My goal is to experience what it means to have a healthy marriage with P3.
If you want to lose weight by focusing only on being on diet or pills, you lose the essence of the exercise. Let the fat person rather focus on living a healthier life and see the transformation that will happen along the way. You will lose the weight without even realizing it. Marriage is work and some of us are putting in the effort towards a healthy one..