My husband of 5 years will be 40 on Tuesday. On my birthdays, he usually asks me what I want for a present and makes it his target to meet. I work and earn my own money, so I can afford almost anything that I want for myself. My husband is also financially stable. I was thinking 40 is a huge mark for him, and not knowing what to get him to please him, I asked him what he wanted as a birthday gift from me. He told me he would think about it. Three days ago, he sent me this message.
“Give me the permission to have sex with another woman. I don’t love her. She doesn’t love me. She knows I am married and happy with you. She is just crazy and I want to have mad fun with her on my birthday. If you can understand and give me this one thing, I will never forget for the rest of my life”.
Dave, I am confused. How can someone who is married undermine, dismiss and distort my perceptions and reality so easily with a text message. Was he ever thinking of my feelings before asking me that? Or he is just refusing to accept my feelings by trying to define how I should feel. We had a serious conversation two nights ago and he is accusing me of being too sensitive and too emotional.
I told him I was against it, and he is refusing to accept my opinions. He dismisses my reason and thinks I’m being ridiculous. Dave, am I blowing anything out of proportion if I insist that would be adultery on his part? He is accusing me of being selfish if I express my concerns. He says he never asks me for anything and just this one time that he asked for something I am being unreasonable.
What is even getting me pissed is the sudden manipulation and controls of making me feel guilty for acting out. I am getting angry right now because I read the post you made about the woman whose husband wants her to dress a certain way against her will. My husband tells me he could have gone ahead and slept with her without telling me, so I should see the honor given me in his request.WTF is wrong with some of these guys?