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A waiting horse

Somewhere in 2013 I met a young beautiful charming lady and immediately fell in love her. It wasn’t easy convincing her in the initial days but as time and fate will have it, she later consented to me with a condition of no sex until marriage. I obliged because I truly and dearly loved her. Her Christian principles made me trust her from all angles and never doubted her faithfulness to me. It has been almost 8 years of an off and on business with her until last few months which I believed she has really come to stay not knowing I was living in a fool’s paradise.

I did everything in my capacity to make her happy and also to make sure she stays strong both physically and spiritually, sometimes behind the scenes and also going extra mile just to see her stay well. Her inconsistencies on the issue of me seeing her relatives sometimes scared me but I was clothed with blind love so I never thought of it to the core. I tried everything within my ability to make her mine but never knew it was to her blind side whiles someone else was being preferred other than me. She has made me a laughing stock before my family and friends due to her pretenses in the relationship. She took me to the sky and left me to my fate falling to the ground and it’s really hurting. I am trying hard to keep the pains to myself but it keeps getting stronger by each second.

I began getting this blackout from her when she asked me what I am coming to do after informing her of my visit to her about two weeks ago. But she never did ask me that when she was in the hospital bed. The statuses on her WhatsApp depicting of apathy in a relationship sounded a warning bell in my ears as my calls to her were also not attended to. I knew such news was to follow as that has been the norm but I thought it wouldn’t be so at this time since we have far advanced in preparations towards marriage. So all this while, I was just seen as a waiting horse, just waiting to be told I had ran a fruitless race and chasing the air all along. I am not asking anyone to call and speak to her on this anymore. It’s her choice and she can’t be dictated to by me. But please don’t repeat this on anyone again for someone will not be forgiving like me.

I honored her in all aspects and respected her but she has thrown a cake at my face in public. I’m still trying to understand how she has been able to live with me all this while in pretense. It’s very strange whenever I look at her innocent face; it is difficult to contemplate that. I had a lot of plans for both of us and have already started but she has shut me down completely and starting all over again won’t be that easy. And from her experience, I think staying unmarried for the rest of my life will be very good for me since I will never trust any lady again in my life. I wish her good luck in all her endeavors and with whom she love and have interest in. I have no grudge to bear with her so she can call me whenever she needs my assistance and I will gladly assist in any way I can. She can pick my calls for now since I won’t ever ask her about why she did this to me. For I have already got the reason and don’t be surprised about it. I will one day tell her more when the dust settles. Thanks and God be with her. Bye

 

 

 

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